Paging Dr. Freud

I've never really been into dream analysis, but I have had a ton of crazy ones recently! I'm sure it's all related to the fact that I'm moving this Saturday, and I've been stressed about packing and cleaning, but it's been wild- vivid, freaky dreams.

Last night I had a dream that I was a passenger in a small, two-seat airplane that my buddy Joe K was flying. We had to land in a very small clearing in the middle of a vast forest. Some friends or family members were waiting for us, and I think we may have been bringing them food. [I just realized that this is reminding me of a scene from The Constant Gardener, which I watched recently, as well as multiple flights Jen and I took in 15-seat airplanes while honeymooning in Belize.]

The area that we had to land the plane was very, very small- maybe 50 feet by 75 feet. Joe told me that it would be difficult to land in such a tight spot, but that he had done it before- I wasn't so sure. He circled around the clearing, over and over again, dropping slowly in altitude. Once we were almost brushing the tops of the trees, he brought the nose of the plane quickly up, then dove straight towards the ground. The idea was to then jerk the nose back up quickly, so that we'd land on the wheels. Right about this time, it occurred to me that a seat belt might be a good idea. I was standing in the back of the airplane, which had suddenly become a cargo plane. Right as that thought entered my head, we dove straight down, and plunged into water. [Reminiscent of Castaway?]

There was one of those strange dream moments where I was outside of my body for a few moments, as I saw Joe release his seat belt, and grab a few important belongings. I noticed a hole in the cockpit windshield, and realized I must have been thrown through the glass. I couldn't figure out where the hell my body was, though, and assumed I must be dead. Then the front of the plane raised a little bit off the sea floor, and I saw myself underneath.

At that point, my perspective changed, so that I was seeing through my own eyes again. I clutched for a few food/clothing bags, swam out from underneath the plane, and headed for the surface. We had landed in a very small lagoon on one side of the clearing, and my body was aching. When we exited the water, I first noticed a cut on my thigh. But then I saw my right foot, which was incredibly swollen, discolored, and misshapen. At this point, I knew I needed to get to a hospital, but there didn't appear to be one anywhere near us, and the plane was toast.

Then I noticed my hands, which were even worse than my foot- the fingers were twisted this way and that- absolutely disgusting. I started to panic a little, and that's when I woke up. I was on my stomach, and my hands were underneath me, half asleep. Aha! That explains the very end of the dream, I guess.

Moving Blows!

Although I'm very excited to be living in a house again, moving really stinks. Packing up boxes, hauling things up and down flights of stairs- it's no fun. You also realize all the useless crap you own when you move. I suppose moving periodically is a worthwhile thing, if only to force you to get rid of some material possessions.

One of the things I'm really looking forward to in the new place is being able to garden once again. Nothing beats veggies and fruits fresh off the vine. Of course, a good garden requires a lot of work in the spring, so we'll see how motivated I actually am in a month or two...

When I look back at my schedule, I've been booked pretty much solid since before Thanksgiving. The holidays were as busy as usual, and then we had all the last-minute wedding details to work out. As soon as we got back from the honeymoon, we started preparing to move. Whew!

Once I get settled, I'd like to make a point of seeing some live music. I haven't seen anything worthwhile in quite some time. A few local bands I'd like to check out are Cloud Cult, Fort Wilson Riot, tapes 'n tapes, and Zebulon Pike (self-described "doom-laden instrumental stoner metal").

Here are some upcoming shows I might attend:

4/12 Particle- Cabooze
4/14 Big Wu- The Quest
4/15 Dark Star Orchestra- Cabooze
4/15 The Samples- 7th Street Entry
4/17 Burning Spear- First Ave
4/21 Kid Dakota- Nomad
4/29 Spaghetti Western Co.- 400 Bar
4/29 Fort Wilson Riot- Nomad
5/4 Ice Cube- First Ave
5/6 Supersuckers- Cabooze
5/7 King Wilkie- Cedar Cultural Center
5/17 Drive By Truckers- First Ave
5/20 Cloud Cult- Varsity Theater
5/26 Todd Snider- Mayslack's (in a tent?)
5/28 Ol' Yeller- Mayslack's (tent?)
6/3 Walkmen- 400 Bar
6/30 Alice Cooper- Taste of Minnesota

There's no way I'll drop $30 on Ice Cube, but I'm quite serious about Alice Cooper. Soul Asylum is supposed to be playing the Taste as well- nothing beats free music outside (especially when the crowds aren't too bad)...

Boo-urns!

Did anyone else watch The Simpsons on Sunday? I was very excited to see the live-action show intro. It sounded like a creative idea for a show that has become a little stagnant (though I think the writing is still very solid).

I was quite disappointed. Couldn't they find lookalikes that actually resemble the characters? The girl playing Lisa had shoulder-length red hair! I'm going to watch it again tonight and see if i feel any differently. Initially, I thought the band teacher was the only person who actually looked like the cartoon charater.

Live-Action Simpsons Opening

This Sunday, the Simpons will feature a live-action opening sequence, with human lookalikes. Hopefully they look better than the jokers pictured here.

Who's Shafting Who?

My pal Hazel pointed out that there's some controversy surrounding the Issac Hayes-Chef-South Park-Scientology brouhaha. Supposedly, crazy Scientologists (that's like an anti-oxymoron) "took advantage if his infirmed condition to issue a statement claiming to be Hayes leaving the show." (Hayes had a mild stroke in January.) The whole thing is pretty crazy, regardless of what the truth is. This guy from foxnews.com claims Shaft didn't have a problem with South Park ripping into Scientology. Hayes seems like a pretty cool guy, so I guess I'll choose to believe that he's been taken advantage of, and maybe brainwashed even further by Hubbard's cult.

Trey Parker and Matt Stone wasted no time in firing back at Hayes, killing Chef off the other night. (Did anyone catch the episode? I unfortunately missed it.) They'll also be bringing Chef back, with a different voice. One of the great things about South Park is their incredibly fast turnaround time. While a Simpsons episode takes close to a year to produce, South Park is low-tech enough where they can react to things incredibly quickly.

If Hayes is really the victim here, I feel bad for the man who would risk his neck for his brother man. Shaft! I can dig it...

Chef gives South Park the Shaft

Hey Isaac- don't let the doorknob get lodged in your ass on the way out, ok?

Isaac Hayes just announced that he will no longer be providing the voice of Chef on South Park. Here's what he had to say:

"There is a place in this world for satire, but there is a time when satire ends and intolerance and bigotry towards religious beliefs of others begins."

Really, Shaft? What line was crossed? Ohhh...they made fun of Scientology. How dare they! You had no problem with the thousands of jokes poking fun at Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. Friggin hypocrite.

*Finally, the answer to the question everyone's asking: who's smarter, nuns or librarians?

Mmmmmmmm...beer

If you're looking for a reason to live above a bar, here's a good one.

The Twin Cities got hit by a snow storm that reminded me of spring storms in Denver- heavy, wet snow that really tests your back while shoveling. I helped push a stuck car out of a snow bank tonight, which is always fun. That used to be a regular pasttime in Minnesnowta, but it doesn't happen very often nowadays.

Thursday Thoughts

I've got plans to get together with friends for dinner and the Sopranos premier this Sunday, so I won't be able to attend Kirby Puckett's memorial service at the dome. I was there with Mike Hyland and my parents after the 1987 ALCS when the Twins returned from Detroit, and the team was blown away by the SRO crowd. I think it will be similar on Sunday, especially with people like Cal Ripken and Bob Costas supposedly showing up for it. I wrote a little about Puck over at another blog. I guess I'll just have to tape the memorial service.


I just don't understand this one bit!!! If you allow pharmacists to decide whether they want to prescribe something, where do you draw the line? Racist surgeons who refuse to operate on minorities? Medicine should be completely separate from religion! Unless they're living in Ave Maria, of course.

Library Stuff
The coursework in library school was a bit different back in thirties! I probably would have flunked this exam, and not just because it's Canuck-centric. Some of my favorite questions:

*Explain any three of the following: voucher, budget, quorum, debenture.
*Assess the scope and value of national bibliography using any one country as an illustration.
*Describe the development of printing in Italy in the fifteenth century.
* "We owe the alphabet to the Semites, the vowels to the Greeks and the letter forms as well as the transmission of the alphabet to the Romans." Discuss this statement.

Fun reference questions from the past few days:
-What does RMS on a ship mean (i.e. RMS Titanic)? Royal Mail Ship- carrying British mail
-Do you have Civil War-era journals with articles about cannons? American Periodicals Series has tons of full-text articles from 1740-1900. God bless technology!
-I need information about fishing guides' salaries.
What county is Merritt Island, FL located in? How do I get a copy of a marriage license?

Funny questions from a little while back:
-Do you have the book Reading Polite in Texas? (She was looking for Reading Lolita in Tehran)
-Do you have the book by Dorris McCullough called Prosperity- letters to children? (She was looking for Dorie McCoullough Lawson's Posterity- letters of great Americans to their children)

Oscar the Grouch

I had originally planned on doing a live diary thing, Bill Simmons-style, but my foray into that field will have to wait until another day. Jen and I had people over for an Oscars party, and I was busy making naan for the first half hour or so. I didn't miss much, but I think I would have to be by myself (or at least not with a bunch of other people) to pull something like that off.

I thought Jon Stewart did a great job, and some of the fake attack ads were hilarious- especially the one sponsored by the Dames for Truth, slandering Judi Dench. However, Stewart seemed to get a lot less air time than most hosts- maybe a backlash because of all the people that didn't appreciate Chris Rock's hosting last year. I thought he did a fine job, but what do I know? Sean Penn wanted to kick his ass for making a Jude Law joke.

They start right off with the Best Supporting Actor award, to encourage people to watch the entire broadcast. I think it's a good move, but it meant the best acceptance speech occurred 15 minutes into the ceremony. Clooney, a guy who was forced to spend tons of his own money to get Good Night and Good Luck made, kept it nice and short, didn't bother thanking anyone (not even his lawyers!), and talked about how filmmakers can use the medium for noble purposes. Plus, he talked about how silly it is to rate art (not his exact words). I completely agree. I like following the Oscars, and I like that there are winners and losers (mostly so I can bitch about them routinely giving the Best Picture Oscar to the wrong movie). However, how can someone watch Brokeback Mountain, Capote, and Good Night and Good Luck, and declare one of them the "best?"

Stewart's best line of the night was delivered right after the montage of "important" movies in the history of Hollywood. Jules Winfield introduced the clip show, saying movies like Philadelphia changed the world. Whoa, buddy! That wording might be a tad strong. Oh well- the message was good. Immediately after, Stewart said "And none of those issues was ever a problem again." Brilliant.

After hearing Dolly Parton's awful song from Transamerica, and being forced to avert my eyes from the artsy (the poopy kind of artsy) choreography that accompanied the song from Crash (they're moving in...slow motion!), I was definitely rooting for "It's Hard out Here for a Pimp." Another couple great Stewart lines: "I think it just got a whole lot easier to be a pimp" and "For those of you keeping score at home, Martin Scorsese: 0 Oscars. Three 6 Mafia: 1 Oscar."

Speaking of Dolly Parton, boy, is she freaky looking! I think her waist is about the same size around as my ankle, but she's still got the baggage up top. She looks like a real-life Barbie Doll. I don't know how she stays upright.

Where was Don Knotts in the montage of death? You can't tell me they didn't have time to stick in one 3-second clip from The Apple Dumpling Gang or The Private Eyes.

I haven't seen Walk the Line yet, and I'm sure Reese Witherspoon was great. But can someone explain how she just secured the biggest payday for a single movie? Seriously- she's cute, and she's a decent actress, but...

Ang Lee becomes the first non-white person to get a directing Oscar. Good stuff. You can't accuse him of making the same movie over and over: Crouching Tiger, then The Hulk, then Brokeback Mountain. What's next?

Crash is the best movie of 2005? Whatever. The spineless Academy gives Brokeback a few awards (including an important one to Mr. Lee), but wimps out on the big one. Crash was a decent movie, and featured some great acting. But suddenly it's being trumpeted as an essential work, taking on the issue of racism head-on. The plot was contrived, dependent on a "Holy shit! I can't believe that plot twist" moment. Wait a minute, that rings a bell. Ah- Paul Haggis also wrote last year's Best Picture- Million Dollar Baby. Mr. Haggis seems like a nice enough guy, but I think he needs to return to his roots- writing for The Love Boat and Diff'rent Strokes. He also created Walker Texas Ranger, so I guess he's somewhat responsible for all the Chuck Norris jokes floating around the Internet. Stick to television, pal!

The movies I enjoy the most are the ones that seem better and better the more you think about them. The ones that are so fun to talk to other people about, because they bring up things that you didn't notice. The movies that are fun to watch a second and third time. Both Crash and Million Dollar Baby are the opposite kind of movies. As each day passes, I like them less and less. When I walked out of Million Dollar Baby, I thought "Not great, but I liked the style, the acting..." After countless conversations with people about the movie, I now have almost nothing good to say about it. The premise is ridiculous, it's about as melodramatic as a story can be, and it relies one one big "shocker."

I still think Crash was a good movie (talk to me in a year, and I may say otherwise), featuring some damn fine acting performances. However, the characters were all one-dimensional, everything tied together way too nicely, it relied on many convenient plot twists, and the message, however well-intentioned, was something a 7th-grader could come up with: racism is bad, and (get ready) everyone is racist! But there are reasons they're racist, you see. Boo-urns!

I did ok in the Oscar pool. I got 11 out of 24 right, but Joe Schwei led the way with 18 correct predictions.

Sunset Pic

IMG_1042
Originally uploaded by moo

I've been a bit of a slacker, it seems. I would like to post 3-5 times a week or so, but life has been fairly hectic. After getting back into the swing of work after the big destination wedding/honeymoon trip, the wife and I are now spending most of our free time packing for our April 1 move to south Minneapolis. I have two consecutive days off work this weekend, which will be wonderful! We'll be spending most of our time packing and cleaning, as well as getting through as many Sopranos episodes as possible. With the new season starting in just over a week, we need to refresh our memory- two years is a damn long time in between seasons!

I saw Brokeback Mountain a couple days ago, so I've seen all the Best Picture nominees except Munich. I won't get into my predictions, since I'm participating in a small pool. I'm hoping to keep some sort of live journal during the Oscars, similar to what Bill Simmons does for big sporting events.

I've just uploaded all of the professional pictures from our wedding to flickr. I'm still trying to figure out the ins and outs of flickr, but it seems very cool. Next up- figure out a way to compress our wedding video, and post that...